I write this in hopes that maybe someday, I can remove the “ex” out of the title.
1. All the promises we made together.
We promised that we’d be sissy-butts for life, that nothing and no one could come in the way of this promise. We promised each other at super young ages the role of MOH in each others wedding. I wonder each and every day what our lives would be like if we were still best friends. It’s so strange scratching things off of “our” bucket list with someone else.
2. Texting her when something major happens or running into someone unexpected.
I accidentally send a text to an ex and she was the first to know. Or she'd see the realllllyy attractive lifeguard from camp and my phone was instantly blowing up with “OHMYGOSH, can he just marry me?"
3. Hearing all the details about her love life.
4. Being involved in each other’s families.
Unlike many friendship that dissolve, her family is still mine. What’s the weirdest is being there without her. Sleepovers at her families house just aren’t the same when you can’t roll over at night and tell her something funny that happened to you that week.
5. The routines we shared together.
For a major chunk of our childhood (obviously before either of us could drive) we’d always meet at the back of the Benton Walmart parking lot to be dropped off to go to each others house. We knew the exact amount of time it took each other go get ready down to walking out the door.
6. Clothes swapping.
I was always about half a size bigger than she was but I still managed to squeeze into her clothes minus the jeans. But we did both wear an 8-1/2 shoe for the win!
7. Having someone I could do nothing with and still have fun.
We were notorious for using the front camera on our phones and recording dumb videos when traveling. We were able to be comfortable in silence with each other at the same time though. There was just something about having your best friend right by your side.
8. Inside jokes no one else will EVER be able to understand.
Sometimes I still make references to people getting “Chesters Chicken” and no one really gets it. We had our own language between each other that no one will ever get the references to.
9. Watching our favorite TV show reruns.
We were a bit old fashioned. We loved I Love Lucy and The Andy Griffith Show (and Summer of Courage and Oscar if you thrown in movies to this bunch). We could quote more lines to these than one could even imagine. Throw in some brownie batter and it was a perfect night.
10. Her social circle.
To this day I still see people she went to high school with and can have more of a conversation with them in 10 minutes then her and I have had in the last two and a half years. Our “break-up” is impossible to explain to them for, well, I still don’t get the aspects of it all.
11. Finding something I know she would absolutely LOVE and not being able to get it for her.
She looked great in gold, it matched her hair perfectly. And green, it complemented her eyes so well. And those lacy boots that she bought in Phoenix, no one can rock them like she did.
12. Late night conversations about anything and everything.
I feel as though if most people had heard our conversations, we’d be in some type of mental hospital now. One word and we’d crack up. Tears, laughter, weird voices - they were all apart of our friendship.
13. How weird and dysfunctional I could be with her and she was TOTALLY cool with it.
She was weird with me. That sums it up.
14. Being able to do things I'd never be able to with other friends.
She’d pluck my eyebrows for me. I’d pick the mushrooms off of her pizza. In our friendship/sisterhood there wasn’t a thing such as boundary lines.
15. Having someone just get me and my quirks cause we've known each other for so long.
Yes, I’ve made new friends but they just don’t have the history and the memories what this one does. Our bonding took 17 years to make - my entire life until our friendship ended; it’ll be a while before I reach this level with anyone else.
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